1. Technically I’m breaking the law as it’s a solid white line
2. There is a drive and two exits from a petrol station on the left where a vehicle may pop out from without warning.
3. There is a turn on the right where a vehicle may emerge from
4. Due to the above three reasons I want to be able to stop in a distance of no more than  about six feet.

So, I commence filtering and out of poxy nowhere so idiot on a Yamaha Fazer overtakes me doing about 80 and is about three inches from me. Belts down the outside, swerves back into the front of the now moving traffic to avoid the oncoming car and carries on. The language that was being emitted from my lid was “choice” to say the least. I kerbed the part of me that wanted to beat him to death with his own crash helmet and stopped as the light had once again turned red.

When I see drivers of cars, vans and lorries etc do dumb stuff to bikes I often think “If only they had spent a few weeks on a bike, they may pay more attention to us.” Then I see idiots like this and think “It really is no wonder some drivers use bikes for target practice!”

There really are some scary people out there! Whatever you happen to drive…. Be safe.

Situation one. A set of lights at a pedestrian crossing go red. This allows me to pass the three vehicles in front of me to get to the front of the line safely. For some reason the red van coming the other way decided that as his van was also red he didn’t need to stop. Very nearly took out the woman crossing; swore at her as she was obviously stupid to be crossing the road when the lights instruct her to and then stared blankly at me as I called him a “very sill man who should pay more attention to the road ahead”.

So, two cyclists proceed to cross in front of me as we all shake our heads in dismay at what has just occurred. The light goes green and off I go. Then…..

Situation two. I accelerate up to about 40Kmph and out of a turning on the left an elderly gentleman in a silver Yaris takes a good look at me and just when he’s sure it’s dangerous pulls out into my lane of traffic. Now the turning circle on a Yaris is pretty good and still he requires half of the oncoming lane to get round this wide open corner. So, I jam on both brakes and drop down to about 5Kmph about three inches from his bumper. A short way ahead the traffic stops and I pull along side his open window and say something along the lines of “excuse me sir. Did you not see that I was there? Maybe you should go to an optician for a test?” He sits staring at the car in front with hands at the ten to two position and makes like I’m not there.

Ignoring me just wound me up so I pulled in front and have a rev of the throttle to which he responded by revving his engine and trying to make his bumper kiss my back wheel. My reaction to this was to knock into neutral and kick out the side stand with the intention of having a “wee chat”. I haven’t seen blood drain from somebody’s face that quickly in a while. The little Yaris was placed into reverse as he attempted to start a “get around the biker and run” maneuver. I wheeled the bike back to stop him. It was at this stage I gave a polite “wave of the hand” and pootled off.

I think seeing the fear that the concept of an angry biker shouting at him caused managed to reduce my blood pressure and as such I was happy and enjoyed the rest of the run home. I know that bikers can be idiots and sadly they’re the ones that get remembered. That doesn’t give drivers of other vehicles the excuse to be ignorant idiots and do things that may cause other people their lives. I’ll just stick with my biking mantra: “Ride like every other road user has full intention of killing you!” It has served me well…..

The silly part of the above is I read varying other blogs which are for the most part compiled of similar rantings. They give a good insight into the person writing and normally make me smile quite a lot. Especially when you read something that you can relate to personally. When chatting to a mate a few weeks ago about this his immediate reaction was “that is the way of blogs” (or something like that).

So, I’m going to try to get back to boring the living hell out of any readers I may actually have left. I think there are two at this stage. So, if you want to read something that is really interesting and talks about somebody doing something exciting and inspiring…. go somewhere else! A good place to start would be Back to Broke. This blog follows an Irish chap as he does something I would love to do. Circumnavigate the globe on two wheels (Without the help and fame that Charlie and Ewan had). Where else would you get to experience things like this:

On the biking front. Snooze is getting better at the whole pillion thing. We took up most of last Sunday trundling around on the bike taking in some nice twisties as well as some lovely wide open roads. If she gets happy enough I think a biking holiday may even be in order. She may even get her own set of wheels! I think this day trip helped secure how she felt about bikes as the weather was amazing and we bumped into a gaggle of other bikers in Carrick on Shannon. It’s a rather pleasant little town should you happen to be passing.

Right so, until the next time……

The dining table was being replaced this morning so I decided to use it as an excuse to take an impromptu day off. To fill you in on the table (not that you care). It’s about ten months old and out of the blue the oak split straight down the middle of the table. Thankfully when I got in contact with the shop they were very nice, accepted responsibility and agreed to swap it as soon as they had one in stock. This was due to be August but they called on Tuesday saying they had managed to liberate one and thus we could have it whenever we wanted. Hence I chose Friday!

So, the table was delivered at pretty much bang on 10:00am and as the van was turning around to leave I was putting on my bike gear to get out for a bit of fun. One quick stop off to close my bank account as those charming people at Halifax Ireland are closing the bank entirely. Thankfully it wasn’t my primary account so no major inconvenience. It was made even easier due to the convenient motorcycle parking (wide path) outside the front door of the branch.

Five minutes in the bank and I was on my way. Going on a spin during the week is always good as the roads are mostly empty and you get to have plenty of fun without the stress of having to deal with weekend traffic. It was that pleasant blend of high cloud and sunshine making it warm enough but not hot enough to make it unpleasantly sweaty. Took in some nice roads and some nice views and decided to e-mail Snooze a pic from the road just to annoy her as she was at work. She’d do the same to me if the roles were reversed! Here’s the pic:

While I was out I took my usual opportunity to drop in to RPM to steal some of his coffee. Machine is always knackered but the kettle works. Just don’t expect milk or sugar and you’re sorted! Got my new number plate and bid them a goodbye and headed off for the scenic route home. All in all it was a rather nice day. Hopefully the first of many!

I had to stop in the first few minutes to fill up with gogo juice (Tom in Meskell’s provided money for half a tank) so I was playing catch up with Snooze from then on. Now being on a completely different type of bike I was taking it fairly gingerly but was still having immense fun. I was swapping between a huge cheesy grin and insane laughter. It took me about three quarters of the way to Mountrath to catch up with Snooze but she waved when she saw me creep up in the rear view.

We pulled in to the petrol station and I was just all smiles. She is an incredible machine. The warning I got from all present and past owners is that the CBR1100 is capable of epic speed but does it in such an effortless manner you don’t realise it. Lets just say I discovered they weren’t lying. After another cuppa and a sandwich we headed off but I took the lead and disappeared into the distance. I loved every second of the way home and got back into my driveway at about 15:00. Backed her into the garage and went inside for a rest. I had a few aches and pains but that’s just the body getting used to the new riding position. Normally I’d break it in slowly but had no choice but a long run with this. It didn’t matter, nothing was going to take the smile off my face.

So, this morning I was up bright and early and immediately off to RPM to get Ronan to install a Thatcham approved alarm system. While there I discovered what motorcycle mechanics do when it’s snowing and they have no customers. Hands up anybody that knows what happens when you put a Honda CBR1000 Fireblade engine into a quad?? Nobody…… THIS (please excuse crappy iphone video quality):

So after that bit of fun and getting the alarm sorted I was on my way home to give the new baby a bath and take some well deserved photos. Here she is:

Bring on the sunny days!!!!

Turns out the bike was a category C write off in August 2008 and then had a registered color change in November 2009. Only having brand new black fairings four months ago will definitely add to her looking all nice and new and shiny. So, time for me to walk away. It does explain why she was far too cheap tho. You know what they say, if it seems to good to be true…..

So, I’ve already eyed up an other one which has been suggested by the guy that does all of my servicing and as such comes with a bit of certainty. She’s the metallic Baltic blue and is still super pretty. Even Snooze like the look of her! So, hopefully in a bit over a week I’ll have some nice pics to share. Fingers crossed eh!

Now the challenge is to find my next beastie. Currently number one in the running is a 2005 Honda CBR1100XX blackbird. This isn’t the actual bike but she would look like this:

Pretty isn’t it! Also happens to be a bit on the quick side which is always fun. I’ve already planned on the upgrades. A set of Blue Flame end cans, Bagster tank protector, carbon fibre hugger and a double bubble screen! That should keep me going for a while in saving up!

I’ll let you all know if the purchase goes to plan!

This brings me to a “Think Bike” advert I saw recently. We’ve all seen the crash and gore versions of these ads which never stick in anyones mind as it’s easy to block out. This one however makes me smile whenever I watch it which can only be a good thing. Hopefully it’ll have a lasting effect on some of the less observant drivers out there.

So, what new with me. I’ve been gym-ing for seven weeks and have managed to ditch eighteen pounds and get a bit healthier and fitter. I do still hate it though make no mistake. All these weirdo’s that claim to love the gym and get a “buzz” or a “high” from exercising…… Well they’re just plain odd if you ask me. I’m doing it because I know I have to. Should I have chosen to continue on my previous path I honestly believe my health would deteriorate sooner rather than later and there are people who would have something to say about that!

The bike is still for sale and sadly nobody seems to want to love her the same way I do. I just need something bigger to do a bit of touring on. I’m getting the desire to pop over to blighty and do some mooching around on two wheels. Don’t worry mummy dearest, I wont bring it anywhere near you! If I do manage to sell her soon enough I think a summer long weekend will be on the cards. Just have to find somebody to keep me company…

The moggies still hate each other. Seems that Misty is a bit off colour at the moment as well. She seems to have slept all day and not been near her food and is now spark out on my arm chair. I’ll leave her as she’s poorly. If she’s still iffy tomorrow afternoon it might cause a visit to the vets considering the problems we had with her when she was a kitten. Fingers crossed it’s gone by the morning!

So, on that note I wont say I’ll be back quickly but I will be back! Have a lolcat as I haven’t posted one in ages!

Toodles!!!